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The wevolve Bible

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The first to crawl out of the "issing fashion" pile is the Revolve Bible. The Revolve Bible is aimed directly at the young teenage Christian girl. It is published by Thomas Nelson Publishers under Transit Books (www.transitbooks.com).Transit.com says of it’s new creation, "It's the complete New Testament, but it looks just like a fashion magazine!" and a little P.$. "Order your copy today at www.amazon.com!" A "boy" version of the Revolve is also in the works. Zondervan reportedly, also has "fashion-bibles" on the way. (did I hear ca$h-ching?)

And yes. . . The Revolve "Bible" does indeed, look, feel and read just like a teenage "fashion" magazine. As the saying goes, "If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck – it’s probably a duck." An updated Bible PERversion translation says, "If it looks like a fashion magazine, feels like a fashion magazine, and reads like a fashion magazine – it’s probably a new Bible PERversion".

If the fashion-magazine-madness was not bad enough – the Bible text used in the Revolve is the New Century Version (NCV). The NCV is the product of the Church of Christ affiliated World Bible Translation Center (WBTC). The NCV was originally created in 1978 as an easy-reader Bible for the Deaf titled the Easy Reader Version (ERV). In 1983, the ERV was repackaged (can you say ca$h-ching?) as the best-selling Children’s International Version. And in 1984, it was repackaged again (can you say ca$h-ching. . . ca$h-ching?) as the New Century Version. The NCV holds the title as feminist "gender-neutral translation". (Vern S. Poythress & Wayne A. Grudem, The Gender-Neutral Bible Controversy, Muting the Masculinity of God’s Words, p. 9) It’s odd with so much emphasis put on "gender-inclusive" and all the Bible publishers zooming into overdrive to produce "gender-inclusive" Bibles that they are now producing a "gender-exclusive" Bible devoted EXCLUSIVELY to teenage girls? (Did I hear a ca$h-ching. . .?) The NCV ranks among the most liberally mis-translated and corrupted Bibles in circulation. We will examine the history and text of the NCV a later with our article: The New Century Version: Easy to Read OR Easy to Mislead?

But let’s first examine the fashion-folly-foolishness of the Revolve.

The cover of the Revolve screams at you with the typical "in your face" fashion magazine gaudy layout. The cover of Revolve shouts the following headlines:

"Are You Dating a Godly Guy?" and other Quizzes

Beauty Secrets You’ve Never Heard Before!

Radical Faith What Scripture Really Means

200+ BLAB Q & A’s

How to Get Along with Your Mom and other Relationship Notes

100+ Ways to Apply Your Faith

Guys Speak Out on Tons of Important Issues

The above feature columns are colorfully scattered throughout the Revolve, weaving in between the New Testament text of the New Century Bible. Interesting, the top of Revolve reads, "NCV The Complete New Testament" — but "new testament" is not found in the New Century Version! The NCV replaces "New Testament" with "New Agreement". Why didn’t the Thomas Nelson-Revolve staff write on the cover "NCV The Complete New Agreement"? Simple. . . They knew better. But they’ll market and promote the same misleading and mis-translated Bible to our teenagers. Can you say ca$h-ching, see 1 Timothy 6:10?

The Revolve "design" is the work of "rock ‘n roll" Four 5 One of Dublin, Ireland. Four 5 One is also the design team for the album covers, CD inserts, posters, programs, etc. for the rock group U2, among others. Four 5 One. . . Now, that is a good "godly" choice to design "God’s Word".

Let’s take a few examples of the Revolve’s feature columns:

"GUYS SPEAK OUT"

Like the other features, the "Guys Speak Out" sections are littered throughout the Revolve. Described on the cover of Revolve as: "Guys Speak Out on Tons of Important Issues". Let’s look at a couple of the "important issues" found in the "Guys Speak Out":

Q: How long should you date before you say "I love you?"
A: I would say that when all you can do is think about that person, and you know them really, really well, then you can say "I love you."
(Revolve, p. 67)

Q: Do you ever think about getting married?
A: Kinda, I guess. But not really. Like, I’d never buy a wedding magazine or anything.
(Revolve, p. 281)

Brilliant. . . Spiritual words of wisdom. . .

Parents, do you really want hormone-crazy teenage boys to give advise on "tons of important issues" to your young teenage daughter? As a father of two teenage daughters, I think I’ll pass on that deal. To show the hormone mindset of the average teenage boy, look at the following answers to the simple question: "What do you think about girls and guys praying together?":

Q: What do you think about girls and guys praying together?
A: There are exceptions, but usually it’s pretty sketchy. I’d avoid it until you’re engaged.
(Revolve, p. 342)

Q: What do you think about girls and guys praying together?
A: It’s cool, but you gotta be careful that you don’t get carried away.
(Revolve, p. 258)

It sounds like these teenage "guys" are talking about necking, making out or something worse! The question was about "praying"! Avoid "praying together" until "you’re engaged"! Be careful about "praying together" so that you "don’t get carried away". The last time I checked, "praying" was talking to the Lord. You know what’s "on their mind" — And it’s not "praying". What a goofy, godless, carnal, mess.

Young ladies, may I give you the Lord’s ANSWER:

Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.
Philippians 4:6

Pray without ceasing.
1 Thessalonians 5:17

Of course, why ask the Lord when you can always pick up the Revolve and get the "Guys Speak Out" spiritual wisdom.